... A Sour Apple Tree

Your source for fast and/or frozen food reviews, Huntington and/or West Virginia commentary, rasslin' (not wrestling) nostalgia, bad parody, dumb satire, rejected slogans, pointless lists, unreliable sports predictions, and funny local pictures.

Location: Huntington, WV, United States

I'm a 37 year-old guy from Huntington, WV.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

My Top 12 Tudor's Biscuits

In honor of the 12 Days of Biscuits at Tudor's Biscuit World, here are my 12 favorite biscuits from Tudor's:
  1. 1. Mary B (bacon, egg, cheese)---Loads of bacon that is actually crispy (unlike most other places), a real fried egg, and a slice of what tastes like government cheese. Breakfast perfection.
  2. 2. Thundering Herd (sausage, egg, cheese, hash brown patty)---Even the most blindly partisan WVU fan admits that lil' brother got the better deal in biscuit nomenclature. I add mustard to mine.
  3. 3. Lumberjack (sausage, mustard, grape jelly)---Full disclosure: this is on no menu and, if you tried to order it under this name, you'd get blank-to-judgmental looks from the cashier. That said, the sweet & sour combination of the mustard & grapes compliment the saltiness of the sausage patty perfectly.
  4. 4. Ron (sausage, egg, cheese)---What I get when I want a Thundering Herd when I'm trying to watch my carbs ;). Also, $1.99 coupons for this one are almost always floating around somewhere.
  5. 5. Miner (bacon, hash brown patty, melted cheese)---I hate the name, as I don't usually associate coal mines with appetizing food, but a very good recent addition to the menu.
  6. 6. Dottie (egg, hash brown patty, cheese)---Perfect for the vegetarian w/ a big Appalachian streak.
  7. 7. Bacon (bacon)---Easy on the budget & delicious.
  8. 8. Peppi (pepperoni, melted cheese)---If WV ever joins WA & CO in decriminalizing marijuana, I expect the sales of this biscuit to increase by 1000%.
  9. 9. Duke (bacon, egg, cheese, hash brown patty)---While I love a Mary B with a hash brown, I prefer that they be kept separate. That said, I would never, ever, ever turn down a Duke if offered.
  10. 10. Golden Eagle (Canadian bacon, egg, cheese, hash brown patty)---I generally prefer sausage or bacon on my biscuit, but if I'm gonna go the Great White North route, I'm gonna add all the fixin's.
  11. 11. Apple butter (apple butter)---Like having dessert for breakfast.
  12. 12. Shaved Ham Melt (shaved ham, melted cheese)---I'm more likely to get this one if I'm having it for an early lunch.
Well, as you can tell, I love my Tudor's. What's your favorite?

Note: This post is my own opinion & I am in no way sponsored or compensated by Tudor's. I'm just a fanboy who likes good biscuits & loves West Virginia.

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Thursday, July 12, 2012

Top 5 Tea Flavors of the moment,

1) Irish breakfast
2) Masala
3) Gunpowder
4) Pu-Erh
5) English breakfast

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Saturday, March 26, 2011

Top ten favorite restaurants of the moment

1. Sam's Hot Dog Stand of 8th Street (Huntington) - Best location of the best WV hot dog franchise.

2. Tudor's Biscuit World in Teays Valley - Crispest bacon of any of the Advantage Valley Tudor's.

3. Young Chow's (Beckley) - Best Chinese food in WV.

4. Etta's (Seattle) - Best upscale casual place in downtown Seattle (killer raw oysters).

5. Kroger's sushi bar. Don't hate, their sushi rolls are adequate and convenient. I stick to the non-raw products, though.

6. Steak 'n Shake - Yes, please.

7. Captain D's - This place will jump jump dramatically if/when they bring back the fried pickles.

8. Chick-fil-A - Terrible politics, terrific chicken.

9. Nawab - Far from perfect, but it is Huntington's only real option for Indian food.

10. KFC - Dark meat Original Recipe FTW!

Hon Mentions: Lee's Famous Recipe, Gold Star, White Castle, Krystal

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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

TCU joining the Big East: My pointless take

Pro: TCU + Big East is a logical choice that saves/creates BCS opportunity for all parties involved.

Con: The expansion, especially with the addition of Villanova football, isn't enough to keep the Big East from being the "Big Least" in terms of the 6 BCS conferences and it helps to further establish the almost universally despised BcS (emphasis on capital letters).

Final verdict: It is good for established TCU and Big East fans, to a degree, but it does little to change my view of college football as a minor league for the NFL and/or a chance for alumni to get drunk in parking lots.

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Tuesday, November 16, 2010


"Holy FIRE BAD!!!!, Batman"

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Monday, November 15, 2010

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals pics from October 23, 2010 show in Huntington

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Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals and The Avett Brothers, Part 2: Notes on Potter


  • I got to take photos from in front of the stage during the first three songs (I'll post the best after I sort through the 200 or so) of both acts. After I returned to the festival seating section, Grace Potter flicked her guitar pick and it landed in the narrow walkway for the photogs. Sadly, it was gone by the time that got to go back to take snaps of the Avett Bros.

  • I overheard someone saying that Grace Potter has the stage presence & voice of Stevie Nicks. They are half right. Her mannerisms during the songs where she isn't playing piano or guitar are Nicksian, but her voice is sooo much better.

  • I also heard several positive, if politically incorrect, comments about Potter's attractiveness.

  • During the last song of the Nocturnals' set, they all beat on the drum kit. It made for a classic concert highpoint.

  • My quads are still aching from all of the ducking in the photog walkway (I didn't want to block anyone's view for too long).

  • I got a sweet GPN shirt for $25.

  • Her set, overall, was awesome. I would gladly pay to see her as the headliner sometime. I figure I'll use one of the inevitable Xmas iTunes gift cards on some of her music.

  • GPN's set: 4 out of 5 beers spilled on my shoes.

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Monday, October 25, 2010

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals and The Avett Brothers, Part 1

I was given the opportunity to cover the Grace Potter/Avett Brothers concert Saturday night and both acts kicked major ass!!

I'll be posting tons of comments and pics over the next few days, but in the mean time, here are their upcoming dates:

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals

The Avett Brothers

If either band is coming to a town near you, be sure to check 'em out.

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Monday, August 16, 2010

Fake Emmy ballot (preview)

Anything but Glee.

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Monday, August 02, 2010

Top Ten Beverages of the Moment

1. Pepsi Max. In Ohio but not in Huntington, you buy them by the Cube.

2. Vitaminwater Connect. 100 mg caffeine per bottle!

3. Tap water. WV American doesn't make the best, but it is hot and humid outside and tap water is cheap and refreshing.

4. McDonald's iced caramel coffee. Tastes almost as good as the latte, but you get a shit-ton more for the money.

5. Ale-8 & cherry vanilla ice cream float. Summer in a mug.

6. The milk left over from a bowl of chocolate cereal. 45% better than Nesquick.

7. Nesquick.

8. Celsius. The official beverage of Mario Lopez.

9. Green Apple Tango. How I miss thee.

10. Long John Silvers IceFlow Frozen Lemonade. Half price during "happy hour."

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Friday, July 23, 2010

My grilled corn on the cob recipe

1) Pull back husk and remove the silk. You can thin out some of the husk but DO NOT remove it entirely!

2) Get all porno on the ear with margarine (not butter, as vegetable oils work better in this heat than dairy fats) and season with any of the following: salt & pepper, Old Bay, or Tony Chachere's.

3) Restore husk to original position. This will allow the corn to cook a bit via steam before being finished off from the flames of the grill.

4) Place on hot charcoal (or gas, if you must) grill, turning every so often.

5) Allow the husks to burn off completely.

6) Turn the naked ears regularly to get a nice caramelization and serve with butter or margarine.

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Monday, July 19, 2010

Songs of my life: fave five from 1980

Part 2 of a continuing series

George Jones- "He Stopped Loving Her Today"

David Bowie- "Ashes to Ashes"

Talking Heads- "Once in a Lifetime"

Pink Floyd- "Another Brick in the Wall, part 2"

Dire Straits- "Romeo and Juliet"

Hon mention: The Clash- "Hitsville UK"*

Note: I play pretty loose between album and single release, if applicable. Arbitrary lists are arbitrary.

*---Also one of my least favorite songs of all-time, depending on my mood.

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Friday, July 16, 2010

Top Ten Favorite Foods of the Moment

1. Arby's Steakhouse Sub

2. Wife's homemade granola bars

3. Mr. Stripey tomatoes

4. Chicken tikka masala

5. Tortilla chips with lime salt & lime flavored salsa

6. Maryland-style imitation crab cakes (too poor for the real stuff)

7. Breyers cherry vanilla ice cream

8. The pulled pork from the Golden Corral buffet with that East Carolina bbq sauce

9. Chili's Southern Smokehouse Bacon Burger

10. Golden Grahams

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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Say what you want about the iPhone 4's antenna...

...but the camera rocks.

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Songs of my life: my fave five from 1979

This is the first of an ongoing series of my five favorite song releases (in no particular order) from each year of my life:

Queen--"Crazy Little Thing Called Love"

The Clash--"London Calling"

Pink Floyd--"Mother"

The Buggles--"Video Killed the Radio Star"

Talking Heads--"Life During Wartime"

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Saturday, July 10, 2010

...ASAT, now with guarana, B vitamins, and twitter

Be sure to follow me at my new twitter page for all the mildly amusing stuff that occurs to me that is too short to bother to craft an entire post around.

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Tuesday, July 06, 2010

An open note to Wendy's

Please, pretty please, bring back the Carolina burger!!

The toppings of chili, slaw, mustard, and onion were of a high enough quality to make for a solid 3 weenie WV hot dog.

I know, the trend now is to see how much bacon a joint can cram on a burger and, hey, I dig it. I really do.

It is just that every burger joint is doing the bacon thing and it is hard to distinguish who has what.

The Carolina Burger, though, that was special.

Even if you only make it a regional thing between Morgantown and Charlotte, you just gotta bring it back.

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Tuesday, June 29, 2010

A tempest

The other night a mighty storm ripped through Huntington 'round the time that Sen. Byrd would've died. It ended up taking out a massive oak in my neighborhood that was, by my count of the rings, some 90 years old.

I've read before that a terrible wind blew through Britain when Oliver Cromwell died. I suppose that is how angels or demons take the souls of great parliamentarians.

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Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Pointless endorsement: Dutch general election

Democrats 66

The Dutch ain't the Dutch without their hyper-tolerant lifestyle, but the decadent social expenditures of the continent since WWII can no longer be sustained.

D66 offers the right balance of allowing me to giggle at hookers and grown men in diapers while on vacation without making me have to pay a VAT of 234234% when getting a disgusting at that vending machine/restaurant place.

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Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Updated Huntington Digital TV Reception for May 2010

Thanks to some boosted signals and a re-scan, we can now get some new channels on our digital TV via our antenna.

3.1 WSAZ (NBC)-Perfect HD (high definition) signal
3.2 My Z (MNTV)-Perfect SD (standard definition) signal

8.1 WCHS (ABC)-Weak HD signal that requires some antenna adjustment*

11.1 WVAH (FOX)-Weak HD signal that requires some antenna adjustment**

13.1 WOWK (CBS)-Very good HD signal
13.2 WOWK's Doppler radar-Very good SD signal (sometimes shows alternate games during NCAA Men's Basketball Championship)

30.1 WQCW (CW) Good HD signal*
30.2 WQCW's pointless SD feed of the same programming*

33.1 WPBY (PBS) Pointless-but-very good SD signal
33.2 WV PBS2-Very good SD signal. Shows stuff from the Create network and some alternate PBS programming, often re-runs that you might have missed a night or two ago
33.3 WPBY's Very good HD signal

44.1 WTSF (Daystar) Moderate signal

* indicates channels that my wife found during a recent re-scan and some antenna adjustments
** indicates channel that I found after messing up her antenna placement and trying to cover my ass

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