... A Sour Apple Tree

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Name:
Location: Huntington, WV, United States

I'm a 37 year-old guy from Huntington, WV.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Charlestonians set to pay extra to be recorded while picking their noses.

I just saw something on WSAZ about newly re-mandated/apathetically non-rejected Charleston Mayor Danny Jones planning to double the user fee so that CCTV cameras can be installed throughout the city. Here are some things to avoid doing while walking around A Brave New Charleston:

1) Nose picking.
2) Wedgie picking.
3) Zit picking.
4) Generally anything with the word "picking" in it.
5) Peeing behind a bar.
6) Trolling for hookers and/or crack.
7) Bribing a legislator.
8) Smoking a doober behind the dumpster where you work.
9) Flipping off cops.
10) Digging through your neighbor's trash.

So to Charlestonians who enjoy any or all of these activities, I invite you to move to Huntington where all of these things can be witnessed on a daily basis and are generally ignored by the public at-large.

Seriously, we gotta keep a population of 50 Large to keep receiving the mad Federal cash to build seven more KineticParks.

We'll take anyone.
.

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5 Comments:

Blogger RedZeppelin said...

No, Charleston, you can't have privacy.

Privacy << Not yours.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007  
Blogger Chris James said...

Seriously, come to Moneyton.

We don't give a shit what you are doing as long as it doesn't involve stealing copper from our still-occupied houses.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007  
Blogger JDB said...

Hell, the only people who will be left by the end of this are those of us who work in Charleston, live elsewhere, and have no friggin' say in getting taxed or where the money goes.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007  
Blogger muzeuterpe1 said...

Smoking a doober? You mean doobie? LOL

There go all the creative types in town. hee hee

Thursday, June 21, 2007  
Blogger Chris James said...

According to both the college kids across the street and the semi-former hippy down the block, "doober" is entirely acceptable lingo.

See also: L, spliff, doob, left-handed joint, 'tweed, 'tweeder, J, jay, joint, jizzle, hooter, hog leg, pinwheel, and Bob.

Thursday, June 21, 2007  

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