... A Sour Apple Tree

Your source for fast and/or frozen food reviews, Huntington and/or West Virginia commentary, rasslin' (not wrestling) nostalgia, bad parody, dumb satire, rejected slogans, pointless lists, unreliable sports predictions, and funny local pictures.

Location: Huntington, WV, United States

I'm a 37 year-old guy from Huntington, WV.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Top Ten Favorite Vegetables

As part of ...ASAT's continuing effort to make Huntington a slightly healthier place, here is a list of my 10 favorite vegetables. With these simple veggie suggestions and a ample supply of bacon fat, mayonnaise, ground beef, and butter, you to can be well on your way to living a slightly healthier lifestyle.

1. Ramps - They taste great, are a local delicacy, and you gotta cook them with bacon fat. What's not to love?

2. Pinto beans - I was raised on these things. They make the best soup in the world and are high in fiber and protein.

3. Vidalia onion - A buddy of mine who was legally dead for 10 minutes (long enough to hit the buffet) tells me that this is the only onion that God allows in Heaven. He recommends the panko-breaded Vidalia onion rings with Thomas Cranmer's secret recipe horseradish BBQ sauce.

4. Cabbage - It is the eponymous ingredient in one of my favorite foods, cabbage rolls (I prefer the Syrian-Lebanese version over its Greek cousin) and it is the base for cole slaw, the WV state hot dog topping.

5. Yellow squash - Cut it lengthwise, bread it with flower and your favorite seasoning salt, and fry with some onion in a blend of bacon grease and canola oil.

6. Greens - I like a blend of mustard and collard, but any variety will do as long as they are cooked with plenty of pork byproduct and served with hot sauce.

7. Potatoes - Baked, mashed, fried, french fried, boiled, twice-baked: It is damn hard to mess them up.

8. Anything in korma sauce - A north Indian coconut milk-based cooking sauce, it turns any and all veggies (even gross ones like lima beans) into my favorite vegetarian dish.

9. Carrots - I like them raw with bacon-ranch dressing or cooked in some sort of sweet glaze.

10. Spinach - Raw, never cooked (unless wilted with bacon fat counts as "cooked").

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